Confession #16 No potion, no lotion

There’s no potion no lotion available in the market, no band aid company is going to heals your heart. So what’s the solution, carrying grudges? Does that really work?

“Well, my love, the answer is no, just don’t. There are no needle and thread to put it all back together. There is no sure shot cause this is a phase of your life. You just truly have to feel it. Every motion, every tear, just feel it.”

Everyone has experienced a heartbreak once, I know it’s painful. I too an experience holder It was the most depressing phase of my life. Apart from the fact that I was doing my daily chores, I genuinely could not get myself back.

My life became a complete question. I was not knowing how to answer it. My anxiety was so physically bad that I had a trip to hospital to where I force every mouthful of food because I was so sick and anxious every minute of the day. On occasions, it would reach about 4 hours and realized that I hadn’t had a single move on bed, I was riddled with unease and helplessness. I put on weight in a few short months. Some people seek comfort eating, some people can’t. I’m not sure which would have been better or worse, I certainly wasn’t healthy, that’s for sure.

People started complimenting me “Oh my god babe, you look so good! What are you eating?” It’s painful, those memories, that’s what I am gulping. I almost used my thinness to my advantage. I took pictures of myself. It’s called being so mentally sad and confused, that you can’t physically force yourself to eat at times. I wasn’t exercising, I hardly had the energy to get out of bed for work.

The moral of this story? You’ll go through this again, more than likely. Because not all relationships are meant to last forever. This time you’ll be a little wiser, a little more mature and a little more reserved. A little less crazy and there will probably be a whole lot more love between you both. You see, that’s life. Life fucks you in the craziest of ways, sometimes you have absolutely no control over how you are going to cope or how you are going to deal with something. But one thing I know for sure is that you live, and you certainly learn. Even if you think you can’t or you won’t, you just do.

The sad end to a relationship is the one where you have to break up with someone even when you’re still in love. It sounds really bizarre, but the truth is that love isn’t always enough. No matter how wonderful, it may be, love isn’t always enough and to be in love doesn’t always mean that you’re happy.

I promise you will emerge from this nightmare, if you have been through it, going through it, or will in the future. Just like the beautiful person that you are. It can be hard to remember this when you feel like a shell of the person you once were but trust me, you are capable of overcoming so much more than you think.

Stay respectful towards your previous partner’s emotions and privacy. If you ended on bad terms, let it go. Don’t put yourself crazy trying to seek revenge. If you ended on good terms, keep it that way. Don’t speak badly about them behind their back. Focus on treating yourself. It’s important to feel good about yourself. Get out of bed. This is one of the hardest things I had done. Get up, get dressed and show up. Nourish your body and soul. Take the time to do what makes you happy. Surround yourself with people who love you for you and show no judgement. Trust me darling this is a good time to explore your hobbies, socialize, create and plan things for the future that make you happy.

Lastly, be proud of yourself every day. You’re doing the best job that you can.
Just keep on growing 🙂

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